Avengers: Infinity War: The Good, the Bad, and the GEEEEEEET OUT!

Today's movie review leaves me quite pensive. The other day Denise and I were finally able to, using our MoviePasses, sit down and watch what I largely consider to be the film of the decade--the millennium, really... Avengers 3: Infinity War.

I was very excited to watch this one, much like everyone else who invested a lot of time, effort, and emotion into this massive story over the last 10 years. We've seen Earth's Mightiest Heroes battle off literally dozens of threats, give us hundreds of laughs, and amaze us with excellent writing and exciting cinematography. All of that came to a head with this one film, uniting all of the heroes (except Ant-Man and Hawkeye for some reason) in one of the most highly-anticipated events in movie history. Superheroes are modern mythology. They literally are. Hundreds, thousands of years from now, they will be cemented in our history as iconic stories and used as allegories and references for lessons--much like how the phrase "Achilles Heel" is so commonly used today. So witnessing such an unprecedented expanded universe where these modern-mythical heroes come together is a really big deal. Today, I hope to give my full opinion in the next article of "The Good, the Bad, and the GEEEEEEET OUT!" for Avengers 3: Infinity War.

SPOILER ALERT: From here on out, there WILL be major spoilers in this article. Turn away now if you don't want to see that Thanos becomes friends with everyone and they all hold hands while infinity stone-colored rainbows shoot out of everyone's butts.

The Good

Honestly, this section is going to be the bulk of the article. There was so much that was good about this movie. But if I had to choose the best thing about the film, I'm gonna have to say that Thanos truly delivered as the perfect villain. This is the antagonist who we've known was coming since the first Avengers in 2012. That set up big expectations for us. We wanted this villain to be big, to be bad, to be someone that the Avengers could truly rally against. We wanted him to be a good villain. And in order to do that, the writers threw all of that "big, bad" aspect we come to expect of villains and threw it out the window. Thanos was a character we could at least understand. The whole time as we were watching each and every Infinity Stone hit the big screen, we were reminded that Thanos was after these little things. And every time that happened, I couldn't help but wonder why he wanted them. Everyone's assumption was, "I'm a bad dude who wants power, blah blah blah". That makes a terrible villain. I've said it before in these articles. I don't care how cool or powerful you try to make the villain out to be: villains with weak reasons to be villains are weak villains. Thanos was most certainly not a weak villain for many, many reasons.

First, he beat the crap out of the Hulk at the beginning of the film. With just one Infinity Stone. The Hulk got his butt kicked so hard that he refused to come out for the entire film when Bruce Banner tried to summon him--even in life-threatening situations. In order for Banner to be relevant in the film he had to wear the very Hulkbuster Armor that was built to counter him! That was an awesome creative choice. But I digress. If your villain is able to spank the Hulk without any effort, then you've automatically earned some brownie points.

Secondly, Thanos' motivations were very... understandable, in a way--almost agreeable, really. Thanos had a monologue early on in the film, explaining why he needed to use all of the Infinity Stones. The universe has finite resources, and is constantly at risk of those resources being overused and eventually depleted, rapidly-increasing a cosmic event in the universe we know as "heat death"--the end of the universe. His solution was to use all of the Infinity Stones to wipe out half of the universe. It would be completely random--the rich, the poor, people from every race, good, evil--half of all life in the universe would crumble away to save the universe. What he desired wasn't destruction, but balance. This message was furthered as he was teaching a young Gamorra in a flashback, by giving her a blade that was completely balanced. If one side were to be tipped, it would fall. 

I find this to be a very interesting perspective; recently, I have been inspired to reread the Dragonlance Trilogy. It's a series that cemented a fantasy setting for Dungeons & Dragons in the 80's, and it's actually quite good. But in this setting there was an event known as the Cataclysm: for reasons people on Krynn (the world) could not understand, the gods hurled a fiery mountain down, forcing a mini apocalypse on the world that still affected the land during the events of the books 300 years later. In the last few pages of the trilogy, one of the gods explains why: there was too much good in the world, and it had begun a pride cycle. When good people become prideful, it allows the shadowy tendrils of evil to seep in and take irrevocable root in the world, forever undoing what the gods created on Krynn. To prevent this, the gods decided that throwing an asteroid at them and giving an unbiased dose of baptism by fire would prevent good from tipping the balance and evil taking irrevocable advantage of it. The gods were justified in their actions, and are seen as the good guys, here. But in the case of Thanos, he's the bad guy for the exact same reason. Even if killing half the population is bad (and yes, I agree it is), he still has a point: what do you do with the overpopulation of the universe?

It begs the question about real life. Our planet is quickly beginning to overpopulate. Billions of people alive, with more being born every day, and fewer dying. It causes very serious ecological, economic, and environmental problems. We have a higher quality of life, better medical care, and fewer wars--or rather, we kill more efficiently than we do in droves. We're running at peak efficiency in terms of quality-of-life, and that's causing problems. There was a quote from The Office that I still laugh about, because I find myself saying it in traffic every once in a while. Dwight is talking to Jim in a big crowd and he says, "There's too many people on this planet... we need a new plague." And frankly, as morbid as it sounds, he's kind of right! We're starting to suffocate on our planet because of overpopulation, and many scientists believe the problem will be exponentially more-serious in 50 years. What Thanos is suggesting is to spearhead it instead of leave it to chance, but instead of the world, it's the entire universe. I personally think the world does need to drop its population, but I would never suggest artificially-inducing this via intentionally killing them off for that expressed purpose. It is wrong. No matter how morally-righteous it may seem, it is wrong. Nevertheless, I couldn't help but see his side as he was explaining his motivations.

And that's what makes a really good villain.

Lastly, Thanos loved his adopted daughter. There was a really great reveal where Red Skull, the main villain from Captain America: the First Avenger was the guardian of the Soul Stone, on a barren planet called Vormire. There, he explains the cost of obtaining the Infinity Stone. In order to acquire it, he had to sacrifice what he loved most. Very poetic, but Gamorra, who was with Thanos, began to laugh and say that it was impossible for him to do it because he loved nothing. Weeping, he turned to Gamorra, and Red Skull explained that she was wrong, as Thanos hurled her off the cliff. It was a very emotional moment that made us weep for Thanos--the VILLAIN of the film! Very touching, and we get a lot of mileage out of this one moment to help us understand a great villain. I was sad to see Gamorra go, and I don't think she'll be coming back. But it is sacrifices like these that make sense in film. She's not being written off just to shock the audience. There's rhyme and reason to it, a method to the madness. That sacrifice has purpose in cementing our opinions of Thanos, of us feeling for him. This is very important, and the writers' execution of this was absolutely perfect.

Thanos' minions. I have to say, one of my favorite things about the film were the underlings Thanos had in his army. I think we only heard one of their names (and I can't even remember his real name, so we'll just go with Squidward, Iron Man's designation for him), but even without their names we could see so much personality in them. In the first Avengers, the Chitauri aliens were faceless, mindless drones we could accept superheroes killing without feeling morally-conflicted. In the second Avengers, Ultron was controlling his army of Subultron Units we could accept superheroes killing without feeling morally-conflicted. The third Avengers had aliens too (that weren't the same Chitauri forces, but were still just as mindless and we could accept superheroes killing without feeling morally-conflicted), but this time they're led by special units in Thanos' ranks. 

One with very powerful psionic abilities, one with devil horns (very Tiefling-like), one that was large and very demon-like, and one that was built like an assassin. These characters were not only really cool-looking, but they gave a face to the enemy. These were real villains and not just mindless soldiers or automatons. They were rivals devoted to Thanos and his cause. They held grudges. They had personality. To be honest, it had a very... War of the Chosen quality about them; I wouldn't be surprised if a large part of these minions were inspired from XCOM 2's massive and amazing War of the Chosen expansion. If it was, I certainly have no problem with it. That seriously only added to the fun of the film and the depth of the characters. Good job, Marvel! Seriously, these rivals were my favorite part of the movie.

The Villain Won. At the end of the film, the 6th Infinity Stone was destroyed, and Vision died because of it; the stone was just within Thanos' grasp when it was destroyed. As a result, Thanos used the Time Stone to send Vision back 30 seconds and then rip the stone from his forehead, killing him a second time in 30 seconds (traumatizing for Scarlet Witch). Not only was it a cool (and horrifying) moment, Thanos now had all 6 Infinity Stones. Before Thor could come in to save the day with his new Groot-Axe (come to think of it, that's pretty ironic), Thanos snapped his fingers--

And like that, he eliminated half of the entire universe.

It was a bittersweet moment. We watched Peter Parker panic and beg Mr. Stark to do something as he disintegrated before Tony's eyes. Scarlet Witch mourned her lover as she turned to dust. Hundreds of Wakandans and dozens of heroes we spent the last 10 years watching and loving immediately became ash while the rest watched in confusion and horror. And with all of this, Thanos had a vision of his daughter Gamorra as a child. She asked him if he succeeded, and he said yes. She enquired at what cost. He said...

"Everything..."

And then we saw Thanos sitting pensively on a planet, watching the beauty around him. But he did not look peaceful. He looked more tormented than ever. At the end of the film, the villain regrets his actions. Such a great moment. The credits started to roll and the title "Avengers 3: Infinity War" disintegrated from the screen. It was really quiet, and then Denise said, "Too soon" really loudly. 

Dave Cullen's Portrait,
The Dave Cullen Show

The audience laughed. But it really was too soon. This ending was depressing. And that's really what made it good. I did not see this outcome. And it's really one of the few movies I've seen in my life that kept me up later that night, thinking very seriously about what I had watched. That's what movies should do. I once heard a quote, which I wrote down in my book of wisdom: "Entertainment is important; it's art, and it shouldn't be downplayed as little more than meaningless fluff and a good time. Art is a backbone of our society, so what does it say about our culture if we've become so cynical as to think it should mean nothing?" ~ Dave Cullen

I definitely agree that this film did more than just give us the promise of a good time. It gave us a movie we could really think about. It gave us a villain that we couldn't hate, but could empathize with. It gave us a solid entry in the ever-evolving modern mythos of superheroes. Everyone in the film (except the Hulk) brought their a-game. The film mattered. It had to matter, after the 10 years of films that preceded it and led to this one defining moment.

Marvel used a great combination of source material and their own take on it. Honestly, Marvel's always been good at this with their cinematic universe, starting with Tony Stark. In 2008 they gave Iron Man a shiny new sheen that shed the tacky sci. fi. feel of the older Iron Man comics and cartoons. Back then, that was cool. It was reenvisioned. And as they continued on throughout the years they've continued to use the source material as inspiration for new things. The creativity of the many writers and directors was afoot in reimagining these heroes, their origins and stories, and even their costumes. Infinity War did not disappoint in this aspect. One of my favorite things about Marvel movies (and frankly, just the expanded universes of comic book heroes in general), is the writers asking, "What would happen if X character and Y character got into a fight?" I felt like Thanos fighting everyone on Titan was a great example of this. Perhaps one of my favorite action moments was Dr. Strange throwing his pocket dimension at Thanos (you know, the one that if you get trapped inside without the ring thingy you can never leave); Thanos caught it and threw it back! That was cool! I felt like that was subtle, but for those who knew what it was, it was a huge "holy crap" moment. Thanos literally caught a dimension and threw it back at Dr. Strange. And movies inspired from comic books are ripe with these kinds of things, characters using their powers and seeing it mix with other foreign powers that they don't normally interact with. From Spiderman stealing Captain America's shield, to Superman fighting the Flash in slow-motion (yes, it's DC, but I don't care), these kinds of things are really cool. You might think it's "nerdy", but there's real precedent for why it's just plain awesome. It's imagination at its fullest potential. Throwing dimensions at each other is just cool.

Oh, he also threw a moon at Tony Stark. A moon. That's not something you see every day.

The Bad

Thor 3 was basically nullified. I get that there isn't room for everyone and everything in the Marvel universe in this one film. But other than getting Hulk back and the tesseract being in Loki's possession, there's no point to Thor 3. At the beginning of Infinity War, the ship all the Asgardians are on gets attacked by Thanos. Everyone except Thor and Hulk die. Even Loki--for good this time. All those characters we know and love from Thor 3, even the Valkrye and Heimdall, just... died. Where Gamorra's death had purpose, the rest of Asgard's death was just senseless. There was no room for Loki, the Asgardians, and the rest of them in Infinity War, so they were written out. It's sad, because there was room for an argument about tuna melts literally 5 minutes later, but not some quick explanation regarding the Asgardians landing safely on some planet where they could repair their ship or something neatly out of the way of the rest of the film. They just died. That was stupid.

And don't get me started on Loki. During Phases 1 and 2, he was pretty much the reason all the fangirls and Tumblr came to the movies. His charisma brought unique character to the movies. I personally didn't care much for him (or the Thor storyline in general, really), but I recognize what he offers and that writing him off is like throwing away a perfectly good filet mignon just because it looks cool to do it. His death didn't even really play a part in Thor's motivation to defeat Thanos. There was so much going on Thor's motivations were lost in the translation. That really sucked.

Heimdall saved the Hulk because reasons. Why didn't he save Thor? Or Loki? The Hulk is an important character, sure. But in terms of power he and Thor are on par, as proved by their skirmish in Thor 3. Surely Heimdall could see that; he sees everything. He can even see why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch. So why did he choose to save the Hulk over Thor, a man he'd known his whole life? One thing Heimdall cannot see is the future, so he couldn't predict that saving the Hulk would be better. Honestly, you can only see his decision from a writing perspective and not a logical one. Which is poor writing. Oh well. It's one I can overlook compared to the rest of the movie.

The Guardians of the Galaxy. I know, I know... everyone likes them. I don't. The first movie was alright; entertaining, and a great introduction to the characters. The second movie was Friends in space, and was pretty much only there for the lol's. When I was a kid, we were supposed to do a skit for a talent show on a big men's campout. The group I was stuck with couldn't decide on what to do for the skit, and so when it was our turn we all got up on stage and started running around trying to do our own ideas try the same time as everyone else, and it looked like chaos. The guy in charge of our skit just said, "Ah, we couldn't figure something out, we're just messing around." The audience laughed, applauded out of courtesy, and we sat down embarrassed. Honestly, that's how I felt Guardians 2 was. They said, "Eh, the real plot doesn't matter, this is all about the main characters making jokes onscreen; we're just messing around here." So take that and then throw it into Avengers 3. Suddenly you have a nice steak dinner with a peanut butter and jelly sandwich crammed onto the side of the plate. Most of the screentime involving the Guardians were punchlines and gags.

Groot was a moody teenager (which was funny at the end of 2, but kind of wore out its welcome about 3 minutes into their introduction in Infinity War), and ultimately offered a neat aspect to Thor's new weapon--more of that combination of source material I was talking about earlier that works so well. So I'll give him that. But really, other than that and Gamorra, the Guardians didn't offer that much in the way of storytelling and were just kinda there because they promised us they would be. That was a shame. Guardians 2 could have been used more wisely to set up for Infinity War rather than a 2-hour comic routine with a little fluff in the middle. Thor 3 was hilarious, and it had a significant amount of plot meat and character progression in it too. Too bad none of it mattered literally hours after they left Asgard.

Final Verdict: 10/10

I'm gonna be honest, I liked this movie so much that I don't have one for the GEEEEEEET OUT! section today. This film was solid through and through. Even the distraction that was The Guardians of the Galaxy wasn't enough to deter my love for this newest installment of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. It was action-packed, true to its source material and inspiration for breaking from it, it was funny, and it had emotional resonance throughout the entirety of the film. The Red Skull cameo made me gasp in the theater, and the ending was both surprising and strongly deserving of itself--something movies today can rarely say. Lastly, Thanos was written so well it made me feel for him more than once, in a film where so much was already happening that it could easily be lost in the sea of information that was thrown at us. This movie could have very easily gotten off the rails with how many plot points and characters were in it. The fact that it didn't sets a new precedent for large cinematic universes, and raises filmmaking on this scale to a new level. So I am pleased to announce that I will award Avengers: Infinity War my first ever 10/10. That's a true opinion from the bottom of my heart. Really, good job guys. Thank you for all your hard work, and for 10 years of movies that have excited me and stimulated my imagination. You rock, and I hope this collection of modern mythology stands the test of time.

Thank you for choosing Taiwanese Takeout!